7 pounds
by Elizabetch
Summary: Jocelynn fae has been battling with a heart disease since she found out when she was 5.She doesnt know if she will ever wake up tomorrow. Now she has to deal with a werewolf boyfriend can she handle all the stress better yet can her heart?
1. preface

Jocelynn's pov

"Hun why don't you go play with Sydney?"My mom asked

"Mom kid's don't play anymore we "hang out" now and Sydney has been avoiding me lately but I guess it's for the best"I said

"Jocelynn Fae don't you ever talk like that again it's never going to happen do you hear me? why don't you go visit Jared before we go?" My Mom said

I guess you picked up my name Jocelynn fae Thail I'm 13 years old and I skipped a grade so now instead of being in 8th grade I'm in 9th grade. I have long blonde hair that is always pulled back somehow and today its in a long braid that goes past my ribs. I have sky blue eyes that are the exact color of the sky. I walked up the path to Sam Uley's house I was looking for my brother Jared. I walked up to the front door and a pretty looking lady answered the door.

"how can I help you"She asked

"Hi I'm Jocelynn is Jared here?"I said

"Yes He's outback why don't you come in"She said

"OK"


	2. where did you go? by fort minor

When it hurts to look back and your scared to look ahead you can look beside you and your best friend will be there. - Author Unknown

Jocelynn's pov.

As I walked out back I saw how many people were here and out of all of them I couldn't find Jared. Hmmmmmm where would he be? PAUL! I started running toward Paul and I let out a war cry as I jumped on his back. Man that made me tired!

Sam's pov

We were all talking when a little girl started running toward Paul and before any of us could tell her to stop she let out a war cry and jumped on his back. Paul started shaking but before I could use my alpha voice he turned around to look at her. When he did that we all got a good look at the little girl. She had long blonde braided hair that went down her back, she had tghe brightest sky blue eyes and light tan skin and a giant white toothy smile on her face but she looked unhealthily pale but that did not put a dent in her prettyness although it does nothing to my Emily's. As I pulled out of my day dream I heard Racheal start yelling at Paul

"Are you cheating on me Paul Micheal Miraz?"Racheal yelled

"hahahahaha are you kidding me you thought I was dating Paul?"The little girl said

"umm well" was all Racheal got out

"He's my brother's bestfriend"the little girl said

"and who is your brother"Embry asked

"Jared who else duh?" the little girl said like we were suppost to know. Right as she said that Jared and Kim came back from the grocery store

Jocelynn's pov.

He doesn't talk about me wow what a jerk!. Oh look who is coming the little jerk and his jerket..

"Jocelynn what are you doing here?" Kim asked

"oh well my mom decided I needed some brother sister time before I left since he's not going with us like he always used to! so she sent me here" I said

"Hey Jared how come you never said you had a sister?"Some freakishly tall dude said

"I honestly don't know. I'm sorry joce"Jared replied

"It's fine I guess I understand start the detachment now so you won't feel the pain later I get it who wants to be close with a person who might not wake up tomorrow. well I think I had enough brother sister time I guess I should go"I said as I started to walk away

"Joce thats not what I ment"Jared said but I kept walking before I got fully out of the yard Sydney and Brady Jones walked up hand in hand. I bet her face looked like mine all wide eyed and shocked but I quickly covered it up with anger

"Hey Joce what are you doing here?"Sydney said

"I don't have time for ditchers and there crap today goodbye Sydney"I said as I put in my ipod

I started singing the song "where did you go" by fort minor

_Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone._

She said "Some days I feel like shit,  
Some days I wanna quit, and just be normal for a bit,"  
I don't understand why you have to always be gone,  
I get along but the trips always feel so long,  
And, I find myself trying to stay by the phone,  
'Cause your voice always helps me to not feel so alone,  
But I feel like an idiot, workin' my day around the call,  
But when I pick up I don't have much to say,  
So, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,  
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',  
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,  
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"

I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone.  
Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone,  
Please come back home...

You know the place where you used to live,  
Used to barbecue up burgers and ribs,  
Used to have a little party every Halloween with candy by the pile,  
But now, you only stop by every once and a while,  
Shit, I find myself just fillin' my time,  
With anything to keep the thought of you from my mind,  
I'm doin' fine, I plan to keep it that way,  
You can call me if you find that you have something to say,  
And I'll tell you, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,  
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',  
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,  
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"

I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone.  
Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone,  
Please come back home...

I want you to know it's a little fucked up,  
That I'm stuck here waitin', no longer debatin',  
Tired of sittin' and hatin' and makin' these excuses,  
For why you're not around, and feeling so useless,  
It seems one thing has been true all along,  
You don't really know what you've got 'til it's gone,  
I guess I've had it with you and your career,  
When you come back I won't be here and you can sing it...

Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone.  
Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone,  
Please come back home...  
Please come back home...  
Please come back home...  
Please come back home...  
Please come back home... 


	3. I'm sorry by flyleaf

"Fear is all about attachment. We fear losing what we are attached to, because all things are temporary. Only unconditional love can overcome fear." author unknown

Jocelynn's pov

As soon as I got home my mom told me it was time to go my appointment. It was a 3 day thing the first day was driving to burmingham hospital**(I made this place up I dont know if there is acutally a place like this)**. The second day they run a bunch of tests to see if my heart can handle it and how it reacts to them, and then on the third day is driving home. When we got there Doctor Willhelm took me to a room with a treadmill in it and made me run at different paces with my heart being monitored. After several more hours of testing Doctor Willhelm sat us in a room to talk to us he talked to my mother first and when she came out of his office she looked so pale and upset. So when he took me into his office I didn't know what to expect.

"Jocelynn..."That's all he got out before I cut him off the look on his face was enough for me to understand what he was tring to say

" I'm dying aren't I?" I asked

" We put you higher on the donor list but your heart isn't up to the task anymore it's going to slowly shut down"He said

"how long"

"what?"

"how long do I have" I whispered

"about a year or two"he said

"ok"was all I said before I walked out of his office

The ride was awkward the entire time I tried talking to her about whats going to happen but she just kept telling me it wasn't going to happen so I didn't need to worry about it. About after that I kept quiet and soon fell asleep. When we arrived home I noticed we were at Sam Uley's house and not our house.

"why are we here?"I asked

"I just need to check on your brother"she said but I knew her acual intentions she always did this when we got home from my appointments she always made sure we were both in her site for a couple of days. Instead of knocking she walked right in I soon followed and saw everyone looking at us.

"Mom? what are you doing here?, Hey Joce how was the apppointment?"Jared asked

" It's none of your business Jare..." Before I got to finish I got cut off by my mother. She finally cracked and started balling and screaming. No one knew what todo so I walked over and held her together like she used to do with me when I was younger and how I would ask her why God made me broken but she would tell me that I was special and that I was made to do something big with my life. So I did the same I whispered telling her everything would be ok in the end that everything happens for a reason.

"DON'T TELL ME THIS CAUSE IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN I WILL MAKE SURE IT NEVER HAPPENS EVEN IF I HAVE TO DIE FOR IT NOT TO HAPPEN!" SHE yelled

"don't say that." was all I said before I walked to the couch

Sydney's pov

When Jocelynn sat down she looked so broken but if you didn't know her and you looked at her you would only see her mask. It was just like the first day we met

*_flash back*_

_"mommy can I go to the swings?" I asked_

_" Yes but don't go anywhere else ok?"she said_

_"ok mommy"_

_When I got over to the swings there was a little girl who was so small she looked like one of my dollies. She had blonde hair that went to her hips and bright blue eyes but she had one of those masks on her face so you could see the smile she was wearing. _

_"Hi my name is Sydney what's your name"_

_"hi my name is Jocelynn I'm 4"she said you could hear the smile because of the brightness of her voice_

_"I'm 5 why do you have a mask on your face?"_

_"It's so I don't get sick from the air the doctors make me wear it"she said_

_"ohhh... do you want to play"_

_"yes!" she exclaimed_

_(3 years later sydney is 8 and jocelynn is 7)_

_"have you ever thought about dieing sydney?" joce asked_

_"no not really why"_

_"well You know I'm sick right?"she asked_

_"yes what does this have to do with dieing?"_

_"I have an enlarged heart where one half of my heart is bigger than the other half so it doesn't work normally and I over heard my brother and parents talking about how I'm a miracle that I made it to age seven and that if my heart gets worse I would die. I'm scared"she said_

_"I'll always be here I promise so don't worry it won't ever happen"_

* end of flashback*

I had broken my promise from years ago I left her

**JOUYEUX NOEL VEILLE:)(MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE). **

**What i want for christmas is 15 reviews please:)**


	4. walking on air by kerli

I used to believe in forever, but forever is too good to be true. - Winnie The Pooh

Sydney's Pov

"Joce"

...no answer

"Joce please talk to me, I'm sorry"

I still didn't get an answer

"Joce what did I do to make you mad"

She looked at me with this "are you crazy look" in her eyes and said

"Are you kidding me, what haven't you done! You ditched me to hang out with a Jerk who tormented me when I was younger and you broke your promise!"she yelled

"But I guess I've accepted the fact that..."She got cut off by her mom

"it's never going to happen so don't talk like that do you hear me?"her mom yelled

"Will you please just tell me whats going on?"Jared asked

"NO because its not going to happen ever"her mom said Mom shouted

Jocelynn's pov

" Will any body please ask me if i'm ok with it? Huh do you think i like knowing when it's going to happen or that it's going to happen soon?" I yelled and as i stormed out of Emily's house I ran into someone i looked up into their eyes and felt a spark but i was too angry to stay and find out what it ment. I got lost in thought on my way home.

I love my mom but she trys to be my superwoman and fight off death but its not possible. I hate how i tore my family apart My dad spends alot of time ignoring me and trying to stay late at work to just not see my face. Jared trys to be there for me he really does its just hard for him to look at me and not think i might not be here some day soon and he's been pushed to the back of my moms attention. Now my mom she's another story she gave up a big promotion because it ment less time making sure i was getting all the things i needed. I'm just a big problem for anyone who knows whats wrong with me and while everyone was walking on eggshells with me usually i act the same way with my family but for some reason after i left emily's


	5. broken wings by flyleaf

Dr. Seuss said: "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."

Joce's pov

_*i was running away from blurs i couldn't make out what they were i just knew i had to get away but all too soon the scene changed and we were in a meadow my mom, and all of my brothers friends were there even Sydney was there they were all watching me and i started to fade away i was blowing away with the wind(if you have ever watched tim burtons corpse bride how the corpse bride at the end turns into butterfly's and blows away to heaven that is what is happening here) and then i was gone _

I woke up thinking I made up my mind I'm going to just stay by myself till its time for me to leave here. That way when I do die it won't be too hard for everyone and I won't cause too much pain. I know what your thinking that I am crazy and only thinking of myself and that I'm probly having a break down or I will eventually have one but I am ok will it I have had time to ponder and accept it I...

"joce, joce where are you" yelled brady?

why is he here

"Joce I know your here come on down please"Now sydney is here?

I started my way down my tree house that Jared and I made when I was 6 and when I got down Colin, Brady& sydney and everyone else was here. What is going on?

"we have school remember?" sydney said

"yeah whatever"I said

(a couple days later its friday)

I am extemely tired. Today is not a good day I woke up late and forgot to take my pills I had a horrible nights sleep with nightmare's every hour. I was a walking zombie today and everyone is going to notice...By time I got to lunch I was soo out of it that i didn't notice i bought food and was currently walking towards my table. Before i sat down i got extemely dizzy i sat my tray down on the table and tried to steady myself everything was starting to blurr together i couldnt make out anything anyone was saying. The floor was rushing to meet my head and when it did i started to slip in and out of conciouseness(i think thats how i spell it) I was drowing trying to get to the surface and everytime i would almost get there I would get dragged right back under until i couldn't fight any more i had to give up


	6. what are words by chris medina

When you trip over love, it is easy to get up. But when you fall in love, it is impossible to stand again. -Albert Einstein

Collin's pov

I just got off of patrol and was heading up to Sam's house when a beautiful goddess bumped into me. She was short about 4'11, She had long blonde hair that went past her ribs but the color was unique it was so blonde it looked short of white. She had light tan skin and when she looked up into my eyes i was a gonner. Her sky blue eye were the only things holding me here and i never wanted to look away from them. But all to soon she looked away and ran away from me I was about to fallow her but Jared grabbed me and threw me into a tree.

"How could you! how could you! she has enough problems and you go and add more to her issues I want you to stay away from her if you even try talking to her i'll make sure you never ever see day light again do you hear me" He yelled

(It's friday)

Jared has been following me making sure i don't try talking or going any where near his sister and i feel like someone has ripped out my heart because of it. I was looking forward to lunch because i can watch her and see if she is ok. I saw her in all her glory but she looked awful she looked tired and looked like she felt horrible i just wanted to hug her and make her feel better. Jared noticed i was staring at her and i had to look away but we all heard screaming

"Joce..Joce wake up SOMEONE CALL 911 Now! HURRY"

"joceyy wake up come one it will be ok"

She was uncounciouse on the floor. Thats all it took for me to be over there in a minute i picked her up and started going for my truck. I wasn't legally aloud to drive yet but we never got in trouble for it. I started driving like a maniac going 120 as soon as i got to the hospital doctor Cullen had her out of my arms and onto a hospital bed and they were rushing her out past the doors. I was a mess my heart felt like it was being torn into two halves and just being stabbed over and over again. Jared and their mom rushed through the door along with others but i barely noticed anything but this pain. I sat in a chair and put my head in my hands waiting for some news on how she was doing. It feels like i have been sitting here for hours when Carlisle came through the door.

"Mrs. Thail we got your daughter stable but her brain pushed her into an icoma so the body can have a rest, she should wake up in a day or two would you like to see her" He said

Her and Jared went in and 15 minutes later Jared came out to tell me i could go in and see her. When i walked in i wanted to ball up and cry she looked horrible. She had a tube down her throat to help her breathe and she was hooked up to a bunch of machines i pulled up a chair and held her tiny delicate hand for the rest of the night


	7. how to save a life by the frey

"We cannot learn without pain." Aristotle

Jocelynn's mom's pov

I never told anybody this not even joce but i think everyone has figured it out since she has lighter tan skin and white blonde hair. We adopted her when she was 2 her real dad was Puerto rican and her mom was russian and they were drop dead super model looking. We could never figure out why they would give her up but they did and I'm thankful for that. After we had Jared i found out that we had difficutlies during birth and i could no longer have kids and that crushed me. But when we found Jocelynn we knew she was the perfect kid for us, We looked into her eyes and it was like we were in a trance and we just had to have her. When we found out about her being sick it broke our hearts i have been trying everything to get her better and to keep her happy. It's been hard with Jared not being around because He's a wolf and Joce not knowing. She loved him alot and they were so close but now she feels as if everyone is trying not to be near her and i just wish we could explain to her everything then maybe she wouldn't be so down. But all i know is that i'm going to keep my little angel close

Collin's pov

I was dreaming of me and joce getting married and having kids when i heard movement in the room, I opened my eye's to see Jocelynn's mom Shannon.

"She's sick you know that right" shannon said

"yes"

" she was born with an enlarged heart which means half of her heart is twice the size of the other side and the heart can't keep up itself and sometimes had irregular beats but she also has an artery that goes in one way and they don't know where it comes out. She has been on the donor list since she was 5 to get a new heart but no one has her blood type. ( she starts crying) I have been tested and so has my husband but we don't match and her condition has gotten so much worse that she could die anytime within the next year. Jared doesn't know about that and I know she is your imprint i thought you should know this so if the inevitable does happen i want you to be prepared"and with that she left

I was taking all this in when i started shaking but as soon as i did it stopped because of an idea i got but before i can even go any farther with this thought i need to talk to carlisle

**I forgot to do this but i don't own twilight or anything that has to do with it i just own my characters**


	8. my immortal by evanescence

Behind every beautiful thing there's some kinda pain. -Bob Dylan

Jocelynn's pov

I was laying at the bottom of the ocean just staring up at the sky. I wanted to try to reach the surface but I couldn't move I was extremely exhausted. After what felt like years I started to float to the top little by little and when I finally did I could hear beeping and people talking. My feet started to tingle and not soon after was that feeling all over my body my eyelids felt like heavy cinder blocks but the weight was being lifted and I started to slowly move them. I started to blink them at first when I opened them the light was so bright. I closed them real quick, I tried again but this time my eyes adjusted to the light. I looked around My mom was sleeping on the couch, my brother was asleep in the chair with kim in his lap and Collin was sleeping next to my bed. What is he doing here? I finally looked at myself I was hooked up to a breathing machine and a heart monitor. I had several needles in my arms that are administering some medicines I tried to take them out when an extremely warm hand grabbed mine.

"you shouldn't do that you know, they are only trying to help you" Said a deep voice

"I just want to go home and these are keeping me from doing so" I said as i looked up at who the voice belonged to and it was collin

"Ahh it's nice to see you awake, your going to have to stay here til tomorrow so we can observe you. would you like anything to make you more comfortable?" Dr. Cullen asked

"yeah can i have some movies you know which ones are my favorite"

left and I was left with Collin and My still sleeping mother, brother and his girlfriend

"you about gave me a heart attack the other day" He said

"why would you care?"i asked

"I have always cared about you I just didn't know how to show it" He replied

"Well then what does that make you to me, since you've never talked to me and you care about me"

"Your friend"he said

"my friend"


	9. We are broken by paramore

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't.-Alice in Wonderland

Jocelynn's pov

I have to stay here for a couple more days according to Dr. Cullen and Collin had been by my side since I have woken up. We have watched every disney movie known to mankind and we were currently watching my favorite Alice in Wonderland**(its acually my favorite movie) **for the 100th time but collin didn't seem to care. I'm finally breathing so much better and they are finally letting me home today. Collin wasn't here when i got released because he had to go work so my mom was taking me home. When I got home I went straight up to my room and when i got in there all i wanted to do was lay on my bed but there was a bunch of stuffed animals and flowers all over my bed. I picked up one of the cards and it was from Collin

"_Sorry I couldn't be there when you got released but I will make it up to you"_

I put all the stuffed animals on my big moon chair and put the flowers on my desk. I changed into a pair of my black spankies from when I played volleyball and an old volleyball t-shirt and climbed into my bed and fell asleep straight away. I was woken up by my mother coming into my room saying we needed to talk

" hun I don't think its a good idea for you to be going to school and I think you should quit playing lacrosse and volleyball and every other sport you do" she said

" Why"

"Its just not good for you and..."

"the doctors said exercise is good for me and I will not quit the teams need me and if i must go so soon I'm going to be doing things i love til the day I die! I'm not you mom I can't just give up on things it's just not me so stop trying to make me do things! YES i am dying but you know what I'm perfectly ok with it I have been for awhile now and If you don't mind I am going to go out!"

I changed into a pair of yellow sofe shorts, i put my white under armor underneath a black lacrosse t-shirt with my nickname firecracker on the back. I then put my long white/blonde hair into a messy bun and used some yellow pre-wrap for a head band and then grabbed my Under armor duffel bag and my lacrosse stick and walked out of the house. I kept walking til I got to the high school and walked to the lacrosse field. I started just running up and down the field and then running some drills when it started to rain but i didn't stop I needed to let out some anger that I have been holding in for awhile now. After maybe an hour or two i could feel someone watching me I looked all around in the woods but couldn't find anyone so i kept going after i scored a shot I heard a snap and i turned around to see...

**Cliffy;) sorry about that but I need it to set up my other chapters **


	10. authors note

**Authors note:**

**I would appreciate some feed back; Should i keep going with the story or no? and i'm also at a writers block, I know where i want to go with this story but I can't figure out how to get there any suggestions? and I will not update till i get atleast 5 reviews.**

**Elizabetch**


	11. set fire to the rain by adele

The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. - Buddha

Jocelynn's pov

I saw the most gorgeous person ever, he had pale skin with black/brown hair and eyes that were the same color as blood. But they didn't freak me out as they would for most normal people but I wasn't normal. He just stared at me not moving and it looked like he wasn't even breathing I didn't know what to do.

"hello?" I said

"My my. You've grown quite beautifully" He stated

"uhmmmm Do I know you?" I asked

" No but you will find out later..." was all he said before he disappeared

I was so confused after that, That I just decided to walk home instead of finishing my drills. Maybe he was a friend of my real parents or maybe he knows my mom and dad now? These thoughts kept running through my head as I got into the shower the warm water pulling me from my thoughts. I washed with my midnight pomegranet body wash and shampoo, I dressed in my usual night time attire and left my hair to air dry. I climbed into my bed mentally and physically exhausted and went to sleep.


	12. Both of us by BOB

"Part of me is afraid to get close to anyone, because I am afraid they are going to leave." - Marilyn Manson

Jocelynn's pov

I had woken up to a loud banging on the front door with a groan I looked at my alarm clock and it said **8:00**. Really?... who comes over at 8 in the morning on a sunday. I slowly crawled out of my safe haven and sluggishly made my way down stairs. Syd was there along with Sam's gang, when my feet hit the last step they all turned to look at me.

"bout time you woke up!" Sydney said

"Its 8 in the morning... I don't ever. wake. up. before. 9" I said

"So mommy numero dos I was hoping to take Joce to go play some soccer with us, you know bonding time" Sydney said to my mom with her puppy dog face on...She was playing dirty

"Well of course you can just make sure not to push her to hard" Was all my mom said

I gave her an look of suspicion ... She never gave in so fast for me to play a sport. I didn't push my luck even if soccer wasn't my favorite I wasn't about to be in the house all day. I quickly ran up stairs and threw off my pj's, I then put on my blue softball shorts and the yellow soccer shirt I bought off Syd; It had her nickname of flash on the back. I combed my hair threw it up in another messy bun with a black pre-wrap headband and did all the necessary bathroom stuff, I was ready to go. Grabbing my under armour duffel bag I ran downstairs to see a sight to be seen. My mom was shoving a bunch of her healthy "snacks" in Sam's face and he was trying to politely decline.

"I wouldn't eat them either they are awfull"

"Oh hush they aren't that bad Jocelynn Fae" My mother scolded

"Yeah yeah well lets go I would like to go play before I keel over" I said

"Jocelynn..." My mom growled out

We soon after left to go play some soccer as soon as we got there Paul and Sam had picked the teams so they went like this. Paul: Syd, Brady, Jared, Seth, Quil ; Sam: Me, Embry, Collin, Jacob, leah.


End file.
